Submitted by: Robbie T. James
“How can I get a date?” This has been an age-old question for single, lonely men and women throughout the ages. And, let’s face it – we have all asked ourselves this question at one point or another. Everyone faces a time in their lives when they have trouble hooking up with that right person for a date.
When you are looking for a date, it can feel like everyone but you has someone. And – it may even seem like certain other men or women you know have got some special “something” that makes it easy for them to get dates. The good news is, relationship dating techniques are very learnable, and anyone can do it if you have the right guidance.
Here are 5 relationship dating techniques that will put you in the position to hook up with that desirable somebody in no time:
1. Fish where the fish are:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4y_qHBrQN0s[/youtube]
There is an old saying among fishermen: fish where the fish are. In the world of dating, of course, this translates to: spend time and hang out where the desirable men and women are. This may sound obvious, but many people ignore this advice completely. They spend time alone on Saturday nights with a book, watching favorite TV shows, or surfing the Internet. Of course, that is the safest option for spending Saturday night. Trouble is, it is guaranteed not to net you a date. Instead, spend time where there are a lot of desirable potential mates hanging around. Could a bookstore, could be a bar, could be church – or even a rave. It doesn’t matter where you go, just as long as you put yourself where the fish are.
2. Get involved:
If you are like most people, you have settled into a routine that goes something like this: go to work/school, come home, engage in TV/Internet, go to bed .. . [repeat pattern next day]. Chances are you, if you think real hard, you will remember of a few hobbies that you used to love – or that you don’t spend enough time doing. The point is: zero in on what these hobbies are – these things you love to do – and find a way to do engage in them that can involve other people. Try online sites like MeetUp to get you away from your computer and in the presence of other who love what you love. Interested people are inherently more attractive than are people stuck in a rut. With just a little effort, you will find yourself in the midst of a bunch of potential mates. And, in the meantime, you will have rekindled your passion for life.
3. Tap friends and family for an introduction:
If you are fortunate enough to have at least one good friend or family member in this world, congratulations, you have a network (if not, revisit #2 above and you soon will). That means that it is highly likely that they know someone (who knows someone, etc.) who is great dating material. So, don’t be shy: leverage your personal contacts and ask them for an introduction to someone they think might be a love connection for you. What’s the worst that can happen? If you strike out on the blind date(s) they set you up on, you now have some more dating experience under your belt for next time.
4. Get a dog and take it for walks:
As common wisdom dictates, dogs and babies are great conversation starters. That is why it is so easy to meet other people at a dog park if you have a dog, and it’s the same reason why mothers find it so easy to hook up with other moms in their area. Try borrowing a friend’s dog or signing up to be a part-time professional dog walker. I guarantee that your dog will be a conversation starter. This is a great way to practice your communication skills, and it just might land you a date. (And, if you are a single parent, try joining a parent/child group in your area).
5. Put your most attractive self forward:
Many lonely single people resist putting too much effort into coming across and looking their best. This, of course, is a mistake if you want to get a date. Every time you leave your house, make sure you are clean, smelling good, and wearing clothes that make you look your best. If you are woman, try giving men a little eye contact now and again. If you are a man, project the right balance between cool confidence and humility. Put forth your best side and the best sides of others will be reflected back at you.
A parting thought: some lonely, single people harbor a flawed-but-understandable way of thinking that says, “If I risk and fail I will end up looking and feeling bad, but if I don’t try at all I have no chance of failing.” This type of thinking leads to inaction, and inaction is the greatest enemy of people looking for a date.
About the Author: Have your eye on someone you want to make yours? Check out this expert seduction advice that has helped thousands of others find relationship bliss at:
insider-seduction-advice.com
Source:
isnare.com
Permanent Link:
isnare.com/?aid=340539&ca=Dating
Submitted by: Nola Lee Kelsey
Into the Arms of Buddha
It was 5 p.m. and I was stalking an angel on temple grounds. As the rain started, I wondered if she would show herself at all. Chiang Mais rain patterns are directly correlated with the contents of my purse. The resulting meteorological phenomena means the rain could stop in a matter of seconds or pour down for days, depending on whether or not Id brought my umbrella. I had not.
Squinting into the droplets, I glared up at the massive Chedi, a Lanna-style stupa which draws in visitors from across Northern Thailand. Sure its impressive, but what I want to know is: How can you have such a large building sitting there for 700 years and not install any doors? Surely it has rained here before.
Where to hide? No way would I take shelter in the two beautiful little buildings in front of me. Stunningly designed, absolutely! But each houses a wax replica of an elderly monk sitting in a clear box. File them under way too real looking to pass time with. What can I say? Lack of blinking disturbs me. Beside, if wax can achieve the lotus position, why cant I?
To escape the deluge, my shelter took the form of a gazebo housing three large Buddhas. I would not be alone. One by one, temple residents trickled in. The first went straight to a mat he obviously kept laid out for these moments. Two more just sat down and licked themselves. By the time the skies opened up completely, three more temple dogs had meandered into the shelter.
Carrying dog cookies is just something I do. I could explain myself, but people either get it or never will. I tossed five treats out and turned to the sixth dog, Lek (Thai for little). She had vanished. Not possible. Would she go back out in the rain? Is there a dog door in the side of the Chedi?
I surrendered Leks cookie to an antique looking Weimaraner. Predictably, thats when I spotted her. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed her sitting in the right hand of a Buddha. She yawned, nestled perfectly into Buddhas arms and fell fast asleep. After six years of visiting Wat Chedi Luang, the temple still brings a grin to my face. Must be why I keep coming back.
Angels of Chedi Luang
Actually, as the donation box says, It all started about ten years ago. Ajarn Rosocon, a teacher at Chiang Mais Rajabaht University, decided to make the dogs of Wat Chedi Luang and the adjoining Wat Phan Tau her mission. Ajarn is Thai for teacher. Her best lessons were taught at this temple complex. Out of a potential hell these unique Buddhist sites have been transformed into a sort of canine Nirvana.
Initially, students and friends helped Ajarn Rosocon care for the dogs. They fed, sterilized, treated mange, vaccinated whatever they could manage from the pennies (baht) they scraped together. The group was determined that the dogs of Chedi Luang and Phan Tau not suffer the life faced by so many abandoned and sick temple dogs across SE Asia.
In 2005 Ajarn Rosocon unexpectedly died. A friend, Ann Pierce, and another devoted friend/student Khun Soonthree stepped in. Adopting Rosocons dream as their own, they went forward, honoring a friends memory by helping the helpless. Ultimately, Khun Soonthree became in many eyes the Angel of Chedi Luang.
Touring the Temples
Wat Chedi Luang has become a refuge not just for dogs, but for all animal lovers. If travelers become overwhelmed by the sight and plight of street dogs or simply need a quiet escape they visit this feel good temple. Try it yourself. Play tourist, take photos, pat a willing pup, or bring a picnic its all good. Then at 6 p.m. watch for the angel. Over a year after Ajarn Rosocon death, Khun Soonthree still feeds and cares for the temple dogs.
Word has it she never misses a day. She was there in the rainy season when her own home flooded several times. She was there in the storm when Lek and I sought shelter. Her bright yellow rain slicker and massive pot of rice mix carried her through the tempest. If it is 6 oclock in Chiang Mai, shes there right now.
Most people visit Wat Chedi Luangs temple complex for the impressive ancient Chedi. In addition, its beautiful grounds are perfect for strolling, quietly removed from the citys frenzy. Vendors offer food and cool drink. Trees and benches offer hospitable shade. The adjoining Wat Phan Tau casts a luminous teak glow over the Buddha images it houses.
Better still, the aptly named Monk Chat area offer travelers a welcoming invitation to pull up a chair and, quite obviously, chat with monks. A casual atmosphere where international visitors just hang out with Buddhist monks is a fabulous forum for asking questions and learning about one anothers lives. In the background the voices of novice monks echo outward from classroom windows.
Whos Who?
Of course, for a few of us the temples house one more special treasure the dogs. Not all are social. Not all are loyal. Some are downright ornery. But to know the whos who of Chedi Luang canines adds to the fun of any visit. True most tourists barely notice them except to do a quick sidestep away. Like many regulars, however, Ive given most nicknames.
Take Ren and Stumpy for example. Ren, a diminutive twig of a dog, is the duos personality. Stumpy, who has a front leg contorted up underneath, provides a bit of size (a valuable asset in the world of temple dog politics) to the team. Side by side the pair can be found on a building patio overlooking the Chedi’s north face.
Ren works her magic, charming the visitors with enthusiastic greetings. Then Stumpy shows his handicap, Abracadabra! Any traveler with half a heart makes a beeline for the ubiquitous 5 baht meat-on-a-stick vendor. No need to heat it sir.
Next, is Lady. She works with a local artist by delicately charming customers to his postcard rack. From there they get a close-up look at his lovely hand sketched works. I suspect Lady pulls in a commission.
Friendly Little Lek hovers at ordinary in the looks department. But every dog is beautiful when they sleep in Buddhas arms.
Not all is perfect. When I first saw Hiccup, I thought he had just been poisoned. Now I know the perpetual hack must be a medical problem. A bone lodged somewhere or I can not say. While not overly social, Hiccup is stunningly photogenic.
At the front entrance of Chedi Luang are the three Golden Boys. At least I think they are boys. They rarely stand. This is the first place Khun Soonthree feeds each evening. Looking at the girth of the Golden Boys, its a tad surprising there is any food left for any other temple dogs.
Across from them lives Lucy the Teddy Bear dog. Had you seen her before her haircut, you would have expected to find seams and a price tag.
No one knows exactly how many dogs live at Chedi Luang, 60+ perhaps. Other notable characters include Cookie Monster, whose cantankerous attitude and dull looks are well compensated for by the fact that he is the only one who actually likes the dull old dry dog cookies I bring. Apparently others prefer Khun Soonthrees cooking to mine.
Living on the north face of the Chedi is Scar and her three puppies. Some dogs turn up at the temple pregnant. Still, her puppies Goldie, Blackie, and Coco Puff are well cared for.
The latest I have notice is named, Oh Crap, Where Are My Ears? Oh Crap, or Ears for short, must be an abandoned pet. He is way too forlorn looking. Its as though he desperately wants a master. However, hes willing to settle for jerky treats – or bigger ears.
Chubby, a pseudo red Chow, and Pigeon Chaser top off the list of charmers over at Wat Phan Tau. Pigeon Chaser will pass any domestic chicken, but heaven help the wild birds if he ever sprouts wings. The young monks at Phan Tau are especially loving toward their smaller population of temple dogs. It is truly a joy to watch them interact. Saffron robes and happy tails flourish side by side.
The influence Chedi Luang has on animal lovers is best summed up by Ann Pierce. A former volunteer with the dogs, Ann has returned to California, but wrote this in an email interview:
I cannot begin to articulate the impact the dogs, Ajarn Rosocon, Khun Soonthree, Wat Chedi Luang and all the other people I met through my time in Chiang Mai has had on me. Im a very different person because of my experiences. My dream is to one day move back to Chiang Mai and continue helping the animals, no matter how frustrating it is at times.
Getting There
You can take a Tuk Tuk to visit Wat Chedi Luang. Most drivers know of this popular temple. On foot enter the old city from the famous Tha Phae Gate (east moat gate) and continue straight up Ratchadamnoen Road about four blocks to the first street light Phra Pokklao Rd. Turn left. Youll immediately see the spectacular Teak Wood Temple of Wat Phan Tau on your right. Take a look inside. Wat Chedi Luangs larger complex is located next door.
Please remember Wats are Buddhist Temples first and foremost. Dress conservatively and behave respectfully. They dont have to let the visitors or the dogs stay. Honor yourself by the example you set.
How Can You Help?
Visit Chedi Luang, have a great time, then spread the word.
Feeding starts at the main entrance between 5:30 and 6:00 each night. Stop by and show Khun Soonthree your appreciation of her work.
Please make a donation in one of the temples three Dog Donation Boxes, set up around the Chedi. Your money goes to food, vaccinations, mange treatment, sterilization of females (and males when it can be afforded), and general care.
The main Wat is currently undergoing a massive restoration. Making a donation to support the construction work, the temple and the temples school is good for all the residents two and four legged (or 3.5 sorry Stumpy).
Getting the Most from Your Visit!
Never approach any dog that seems reluctant. Get acquainted slowly with the friendly animals. Their continued socialization, or at least apathy to people, keeps them from wearing out their welcome at the temple.
Do not bring too many good tasting cookies: bacon, pork rings, a side of beef The bigger dogs will follow and fights can ensue with defenseless smaller ones. Dry old dog cookies rate low on the taste scale. In other words, they are a perfect cheap way to give snacks to those that will eat them eventually. If in doubt, donate the money instead. It goes to the right place.
Helping Dogs in Chiang Mai
If you live in Thailand, consider helping change the world one temple at a time. Get advice form angels and/or adopt your own temple with permission of the monks. Make it a family, business, class or club project. Work with a reputable vet. Dr. Nook in Chiang Mai is aces!
Other organizations that help pets in the Chiangmai area temples include Lanna Dog Rescue and Care for Dogs. Both have web sites and are always looking for volunteers or donations of funds, foods and materials.
In addition, Care for Dogs also has a wonderful shelter offering adoptions of healthy rescued dogs and puppies to good homes. Remember, for each new pet that finds a family, space is made for a suffering dog to be brought into their facility. What a beautiful way to help one – dog at a time.
About the Author: Nola L. Kelsey is the author of Bitch Unleashed: The Harsh Realities of Goin Country and coauthor of the scathing political satire Keeping the Masses Down. She is currently wandering SE Asia for two years while she pretends to write her next book.Read more of Kelseys work at,
nolakelsey
Source:
isnare.com
Permanent Link:
isnare.com/?aid=93734&ca=Travel}
